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Introduction

I have been thinking of starting my own blog for a long time, I kept putting it off as I wasn’t sure that what I would write would mean anything to anyone other than myself. In the last few days I have come to realise that regardless of what anyone else thinks I need to do this for myself. I have so many thoughts running around my head that I need to start letting them out. Hopefully what I write will resonate with some of you. Please bare with me as I learn how to navigate this new world. I look forward to sharing my thoughts with you!

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Connections

Generation after generation we have slowly allowed ourselves to be conditioned that connection is not really needed within our society in order for it to function. We have become so busy and self absorbed that we no longer connect with others on a deep level, like as humans, we are supposed to in order to find peace and true happiness.

The view that we no longer need unconditional love, physical touch, compassion, understanding or interaction with others in person, is what has caused the world to become a place of such sadness and unhappiness.

When major events happen in the world the usual reaction to it is to unite, however in the last 9 months we have seen the exact opposite occur. Compassion and kindness for our fellow humans has nearly all but disappeared and there is a major global disunity occurring at present that needs to be undone. Society needs to begin to heal. We need to start to come together, to work together to bring back the light.

This does not mean that it is expected that we all agree on every topic all of the time. It is ok to have differing opinions, in fact having a difference of opinion is what makes the world an interesting place to be, however it does mean being respectful and understanding.

Along with slowly eradicating true connections with others we have also been slowly conditioned to eradicate our connections within ourselves, to our higher self, our hearts, the earth and the universe. Now more than ever we need to start to look within and find our inner truth. It is time to begin to reconnect with our true selves! It is time to walk barefoot in the grass and feel our connection with the earth! It is time to really listen to what the universe is telling us! It is time to listen to and follow our heart!

Connection, Love and Understanding are what make the world a beautiful place. We need to begin working our way to creating a world where love and connection are the key. They are the integral ingredients for peace, true happiness and harmony. The easiest place to start to find these things is within ourselves. Finding groups of likeminded people to then connect with helps us to grow.

Now is the time to break the chains of conditioning that we have been subjected to and bring back connection!!

Love, Light and Blessings 💜💫🙏

The limitations on what we are capable of are only what our mind allows them to be.

As the storms roll in and the seasons change there is so much more time to sit and meditate on the things that are happening around us all. It has come to a point where we need to begin to make decisions and look towards the future.

In the last few months many of us have had way more time to think than we would normally like. Many have been restricted in what we can and cannot do. What if those restrictions though, have only been in our own minds? While our movements may have been limited, the possible limitations for what we are capable of have only been limited as far as we each allow them to be. Just because we can’t go everywhere that we would have once, does not mean that we can not still make the changes to our lives that we are meant to or want to.

How long are we going to sit back and allow someone else’s opinion of us matter more than our opinion of ourselves? Each and every one of us chose to be here on earth in this time and place for a reason. We all have a purpose, even if we haven’t managed to tap into and find it yet. The damage that can be done if we do not follow our true path in life can be great and long reaching. We each deserve to be able to rise to our full potential and set an example for following generations.

We all go through times when we just can’t see clearly, when everything seems a complete mess and we don’t know which way is up. It is in times like this when everything seems completely hopeless that we are able to tap into strength that we never realised we had. Now is the time to start thinking outside the box, rise above what we have been conditioned to believe about our capabilities and begin walking new pathways. Also, spend time building up others that we know are embracing new passions and support them to better and change themselves too. We may each think and do things differently but we need to be showing kindness, compassion and understanding, especially when someone is in a stage of growth. If others don’t show the same towards us and our new endeavours in return that is a lack in them, not in ourselves.

The time has come for us to move forward or get left behind. Do we move to make our dreams a reality or do we let what others think of us determine our abilities?

Love, Light and Blessings 💜💫🙏

Physical Distance vs Social Isolation

The world over there is a lot of fear and uncertainty right now. Everyone is questioning what is going to happen next and how bad things could get. The reality though is that we just don’t know. So many people are just looking out for themselves, stripping supermarket shelves bare, using verbal/physical abuse and there is so much judgement.

We all need to take a step back, stop 🛑 and just look. Look at ourselves, look at others without judgement and look out for our neighbours, friends and each other.

The language that I am currently hearing so much of is all focused around social distancing. I think that this is subconsciously asking everyone to only think about themselves.

In my opinion we should change out the word “social” and think about replacing it with the word “physical”. What is required right now is for us to “Physically” distance ourselves from others to reduce the risks but, we can still be “social” with each other!! We can sit outside the window and talk to someone that is requiring physical isolation, we are still able to email, text and pick up the phone and have a conversation!!

We all still are able to be polite and treat each other with respect. Just because we need to keep a physical distance does in no way mean that we have to start completely cutting people off from the outside world or leave our manners behind.

If we continue to use words like “social distancing” and “social isolation” in the long run we will find that so many may not be physically unwell but will become mentally unwell from being completely cut off from the outside world as more begin to only think of themselves. If you know someone that has had to physically isolate themselves make sure that you check in on them regularly by calling or sending a text. Call your elderly neighbour and ask them if they need anything. Make sure that your loved ones and friends know that you are still around and that if you can you will help them in any way you can if they need it!

I am definitely in no way saying to disregard all the instructions that we are being given at all! These have been put in place for a reason and must be followed!! What I am saying is stop and look at the language we are using and remember that even though we have to PHYSICALLY distance ourselves from others we don’t have to cut them off from the world and we can still ALWAYS treat each other with respect!!

Love, Light and Blessings 💜💫🙏

ENTERING A NEW DECADE 🌌

As we welcome in the New year we are also welcoming a new decade. We are entering a time of major new beginnings and although we need to acknowledge the past decade, it is time to let go of old fears, grudges and negativity in order to thrive and flourish in the new! 2019 was a year of endings and letting go. 2020 is a year of new beginnings and building the life we want to take forward into this next decade.

Letting go of the old to make room for the new does not mean that we forget the lessons that we learnt from our experiences though. These experiences have helped to shape who we are but we can’t let them control who we become. We need to remember all of the good times and treasure those memories without letting the hurts and fears overtake them.

In the last decade we were guided to manifest and wait for those things to come to us. In this next decade we will be guided to manifest and go out and grab a hold of it with both hands. 2020 is going to be a time of big revelation. If we are able to let go of old fears and constraints we will see a whole new world of wonder and opportunities open up before us. We are being guided by the universe to prepare for unlimited abundance and success if only we are willing to be open to it.

If we all start to take small steps towards the changes we all wish to see in the world we CAN make them a reality! Each one of us is responsible for making the positive changes in ourselves so that the life that you wish to bring into this reality is possible. Take time out to sit and look internally at what you really wish for in this next decade, paint that picture in your mind and don’t leave out the finer details!

My wish for you all is that this new year and decade will bring all your dreams alive and that it will be filled with many blessings, much love and happiness!!

Love, Light and Blessings 💜💫🙏🏻

Happiness is Found Within Us!

As the festive season speeds up and we are in the last few weeks of the year as well as the decade, I have been having many conversations with my girls about not requiring materialistic things to bring us happiness.

As we were sitting in the kitchen the other evening my 5 year old asked if I could write something down for her. When asked what she wanted written she replied with “I want you to write me a Christmas list for Santa.” I replied with “Ok. What would you like written?” Her reply made me stop. She said “I don’t care what you get me I’m happy with anything!” I then asked her why and her response floored me. She told me that she doesn’t need stuff to be happy.

The fact that my 5 year old understands that happiness doesn’t come from materialistic items and she is happy with just spending time with her family is a concept that a lot of adults can’t seem to grasp. We live in a world that thrives on materialistic objects and we are programmed to believe that in order to be happy and successful we need to have things.

Happiness is actually something that comes from within. Some of the happiest people on earth actually have very little and those that have little often are very generous with what they do have.

So much time and money is spent looking outside of ourselves trying to fill a void thinking that it will help us to achieve happiness. However, following where our heart leads us, spending time on inner reflection and even in solitude at times can help us to achieve real happiness. If we learn to rely on our inner selves and not our external environment we can find that place within where happiness is truly found.

At the end of the day we are responsible for creating our own happiness and we don’t need material objects for that to be achieved. Those that we choose to bring into our inner circle in this life should be there to add layers to the happiness that we have already created on our own and not be given the responsibility of making us happy.

This journey called life is a gift given to us so that we can learn to give and receive unconditional love. Happiness is the beautiful outcome of this.

Wishing all of you many blessings over the holiday season and into the coming year!

Love, Light and Blessings 💜💫🙏🏻

The Emergence of the Inner Child

The common consensus in society these days is that in order to be seen as successful you must have material wealth. If you don’t have as much in the bank as others, you don’t drive fancy cars or you don’t buy your children designer clothes then you are seen as not being successful in this life. There is a perceived competition between family members and friends to show that they are better and more successful. This causes much stress and feelings of failure to come up if you feel that you don’t measure up.

As adults we often look back at how simple life was when we were a child and wish that we were able to go back to the days where we didn’t have to worry about paying bills, cleaning and basically just being what most feel is “responsible and functioning members of society.” Have you ever heard a child laugh and think that it would be really great to be so carefree again? We think about the days when we could run and play outside with our friends and talk to the little fairies that no one else could see. We were able to make up stories and no one would think that we were crazy.

That part of ourselves, our inner child, is still there just under the surface. It is there under all of the indoctrination and conditioning that we have gone through during our life so far. We all still have a piece of that child inside of us that would be willing to come out and play if only we would let down our guard a little and be less constricted.

We have become so confined by what we have been taught is appropriate that letting our hair down and having some fun is generally something that we feel is not appropriate. We feel that we have to keep the part of us that still sees the world with childlike wonder hidden in order to maintain a certain appearances.

We need to start to allow our inner child to emerge. Play with your children. Spend time at the park and sit on the swing. Have a go on the slide. Climb on the equipment with them. Write and make up stories. You could even sit outside in the grass and talk to the fairies. Allow yourself to do the things that you find enjoyment in. Have fun! Our time on earth is not infinite. Spending it worrying about what others think of us limits us from being completely in the moment and in touch with what brings us 100% enjoyment.

Our success should not be rated on materialistic wealth but on the wealth of happiness we have within. There is more to this life than our bank balance and our inner child will help guide us to what truly makes us happy!

Love, Light and Blessings 💜💫🙏

The Narcissistc “Friend”

Lately there have been many articles and posts on Narcissism and Gas-lighting, however, all of these seem to focus on people being either someones partner or parent. What there hasn’t been, is any articles relating the same traits that can also be portrayed under the guise of friendship. People that have had friends like this can suffer from the same emotional and mental damage as someone in a romantic relationship if they are exposed to the behaviour for an extended period of time.

When you are friends with someone and you spend extended time together you can be privy to some of their most private thoughts and feelings and naturally, will in turn share yours with them. As a result this makes it easy for someone that has Narcissistic and Gas-lighting tendencies to take advantage. They are usually very careful and bide their time to gain your trust and as much information from you as possible. They will then, eventually, twist and use anything you have ever said to them against you. They tend to befriend people that are sensitive, appear to not have many friends and may not be able to voice their feelings well. They will especially take advantage of someone that is already emotionally vulnerable. They will build you up so that you have confidence in them and their support and then at a very opportunistic moment will do a complete 180 and bring up all the “flaws” that they perceive to see in you. In your personality, in how you do your job as well as in the type of person and the type of friend you are. They will more than likely be passive aggressive when doing so and state that they are telling you out of a place of love as they just want to see you become the best “Version” of yourself. They will go on to explain how much better they are at it and how you should do what they do.

When you are friends with someone like this they will erode your self confidence slowly and over time in an attempt to help their behaviour go unnoticed for as long as possible. If you ever express an opinion that is different from theirs they will either attempt to talk over the top of you, blatantly ignore you or argue with you until you accept their way of thinking. If you call them out on their behaviour they will turn it back on you in an attempt to make it your fault. They will never take responsibility for their actions or the way that they have made you feel and they most certainly will never apologise for their behaviour.

If they feel that you are pulling away or out from under their influence they will do whatever they feel is necessary to make you feel small or will spread lies and misinformation about you to others that know you in an attempt to undermine, belittle and isolate you so that they can regain that control. To an outsider they will always attempt to make any falling out to appear that it is your fault, that they have done absolutely nothing wrong and that they are the victim. When things don’t go their way it will always always be someone else fault and never their own behaviour that caused the outcome. This is usually when you will see the appearance of what looks like a 2 year old tantrum. They haven’t got what they wanted so they will spit verbal abuse at everyone they can think of in an attempt to make themselves feel better. Unfortunately these kind of people usually manage to keep their behaviour hidden from the majority of the world and only expose it to the people they are wanting to control. This will work for an extended period of time before the gig will be up, others will start to see the tendencies that they attempted to hide and eventually their true colours will be revealed.

As much as it hurts when you realise that a Narcissistic and Gas-lighting person has made you feel like a fool and has eroded your sense of self worth, trust and confidence in the end you will come to understand that these kinds of people must have pretty awful lives if they wish to hurt, belittle and humiliate others in order to make themselves feel superior. At the end of the day if you have walked away from a “friend” like this you are the one that has won. Yes it may take a lot of work and time to recover from the experience and part of you may always be more cautious about the people you let close to you but, you have walked away and they no longer have the ability to control you. You have the control as to who you let into and stay in your life.

Love, Light and Blessings 💜💫🙏🏻

Anxiety Is Real!

*I normally don’t focus on this type of topic when I write, so this is not a type blog post, but this is something that I felt needed to be shared and something that I experience personally. If by sharing I help just one person feel less alone then that’s amazing.*

Ok I am just going to come right out and say it! Anxiety sucks!! It sucks hard!! There are so many different forms of anxiety out there and every single person has different things that trigger theirs.

Some people suffering from it like myself are able to keep it well hidden so that people closest to them don’t even know about it. You are still able to function on a day to day basis but something as simple as picking ups the phone to call someone is a big deal.

Everyone goes through stages where they hide or conceal what’s really going on underneath the surface. Some of us struggle and push our way through the hard times in silence because we don’t want to burden others with our issues or we simply just don’t know who to trust with the information.

There have been a couple of times lately when I have had mild anxiety attacks in public. I have been standing in the middle of the supermarket isle trying to even out my breathing and generally pull my shit together without alerting anyone else around me that I am freaking out about being around so many other people. I don’t handle crowds well.

I have days where if I didn’t have kids that had to be dropped off at school I wouldn’t get out of my pjs let alone leave the house. I also have weeks where I would be happy if I didn’t speak to a single person. (As a side note I will say that I am NOT depressed). I will say yes to doing things or going somewhere and then try to find a way out of it without having to upset anyone. I will practice over and over again a conversation in my head before I pick up the phone to make a simple call especially to someone I don’t know. If I am in a situation where I don’t feel comfortable I will struggle to make eye contact and will not contribute much to the conversation which at times may make people think that I am cold or rude.

I have all these feelings and emotions that go through my head constantly but they are, 9 times out of 10, ones that very few people would ever see on the outside. You see I have coping mechanisms that I put into place to conceal what is going on inside. Not to deceive others but to protect myself. I will offer to help others in a heartbeat but I am rarely one to let on that I may need support myself.

The way we treat others can and does influence how they see themselves. Sometimes words that are said flippantly that you don’t mean to hurt or harm leave someone second guessing their self-worth, especially if they have anxiety.

Regular or consistent exposure to narcissistic behaviour from someone will do damage that can take a long time to heal. Self esteem and self confidence is something that many take for granted until it has been eroded.

I guess the point I am trying to get across is that you never know what is going on behind closed doors.

Be kind with your words and your actions. Be the kind of person that will ask someone twice if they are ok if you can see that they may not have been 100% truthful the first time you asked. Be an example of the kind of person you want your children to grow up to be!

Remember that you don’t have to have your shit together all the time! It IS ok to be a hot mess!! It is ok to sit on the couch in your pjs every now and then when the kids are at school and watch daytime tv eating ice cream as long as it isn’t every day!! It is also ok to ask for help when you need it.

So I will say it again Anxiety sucks and it sucks hard!! Just remember that there are many of us out there and that you are never alone!

Love, Light and Blessings 💜💫🙏🏻

💜 Unconditional Love 💜

When some think about a person being spiritual they assume that they have it all together. There is a perceived notion that as a spiritual person may appear to be calm on the outside that their life must be this perfect journey. This in actual fact is simply not the case, what most don’t see are the things that we all struggle with on a daily basis.

Most people that begin on a spiritual path have usually gone through tremendous struggles, stresses and pain to get to the point that they can appear calm and collected, even when they are a mess inside. They have survived some of the most difficult and heartbreaking times of their lives.

We all have different experiences and cope with them in different ways. Some of us struggle to process emotions as quickly as we would like, while others process methodically and that is ok, we are all unique.

Lately the level of tolerance for others seems to have gotten thin and judgement has become rife. People have forgotten what it is like to have compassion and empathy for others. Spirituality is not about faith, religion or how to gain inner peace. It is also not about wealth and what we can personally gain from others. It is, at the true core, about unconditional love. Having unconditional love for our fellow human beings, animals and our planet as a whole.

By sitting in judgement of others we are not spreading unconditional love, we are giving love only if our version of perceived reality is met. Judgement causes fear. Fear that we are not good enough and that we have to meet certain expectations in order to receive love.

When asked what I believe in if I don’t follow an organised religion the answer is easy, I believe in unconditional love. The saying that “love makes the world go round” is true. If more people believed in giving unconditional love the world would be a much more harmonious place to be.

Giving unconditional love does not mean that you have to be best friends with everyone. It certainly does not mean that you have to be a doormat and agree with everyone else’s opinion or even like someone. It does mean though that we have to respect that not everyone is the same. If you don’t click with someone you let them go with love and move on with grace.

Becoming truely in touch with your spirituality, what you believe and bringing that into your everyday life is a major achievement and something to be proud of. By each one of us making the changes to live giving unconditional love we can all make a difference in the world! Are you ready?

Love, Light and Blessings 💜💫🙏🏻

Motherhood

One of the most important jobs a woman can ever have is being a mother. It is also one of the ones that a woman is most criticised for. People give the mother with kids that are being challenging rude looks. If you give you child chips or chicken nuggets for one meal you get told that you are not feeding them properly. Mothers are constantly being judged for the choices they make regarding their children. As a mother this can be quite disheartening, you don’t know what that mother has had to deal with that day. It may be taking all her strength just to stay on her feet in that moment and she just needs a little understanding.

Motherhood is hard. There is no rule book to follow and no matter how many people offer advice it won’t make any difference as every single child is different. Every day is a learning curve raising a child. Every day a mother gets up and does what is needed for the day and every night she goes to bed worrying that she may not have done enough. Every day she will stress that by getting frustrated with her child she will do permanent damage that can’t be undone.

The truth is we are not meant to be perfect. Our children don’t need us to be. They just need us to be present. By us making mistakes they see that they also don’t need to be perfect. By seeing us learning from the mistakes we make they know that we are doing the best we can to become the best version of ourselves which is in turn setting a beautiful example of the kind of humans these little people can become. Our children challenge us on a daily basis. They push boundaries and at times it looks like they are on a mission to break us.

As a mother it is vital that we make sure that we take time for ourselves every now and again. To connect with our passions and ensure that we remain grounded. Without taking this important self care time we can begin to feel like we are loosing our identity. Taking time for ourselves can be as simple as spending 20 minutes out in the sun, going for a walk, journaling, colouring, mediating or taking a bath once the children go to bed. Connecting to the heart of what makes us feel ourselves is the key. By doing this we are showing ourselves love and respect and will be better mothers for it.

Having time out for ourselves will give us the strength and patience we need to interact with our children and fully engage and connect with them. They will get the best parts of us rather than the stressed out parts. Remember we are all doing the best that we possibly can and It is ok to ask for help when it is needed.

Children grow so quickly and before we know it they will be having children of their own. We need to raise them to respect themselves and others around them by setting the example of respecting ourselves!

Love, Light and Blessings 💜💫🙏🏻